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Law Offices of John A. Guthrie
  • Home
  • About
  • Attorneys
  • Services
    • Divorce
      • High – Asset Divorce
      • Business Valuation and Division
      • Property Division
      • Spousal Support
      • Child Custody and Visitation
      • Child Support
      • Contested and Uncontested Divorce
    • Domestic Violence
      • Domestic Violence And Divorce
      • Domestic Violence Restraining Orders
    • Family Law
      • Paternity
      • Post – Judgment Modifications
    • Mediation Services
  • Articles
    • California Community Property Basics
    • Changing the Terms of Your California Divorce Decree
    • Getting a Divorce? Watch Out for Hidden Assets
    • Modifying Child Support Payments in Tough Economic Times
    • Modifying Parenting Plans an Ongoing Process in California
    • Financial considerations for divorcing baby boomers
    • Imputation of income: Best interests of child finding required
    • Want an amicable divorce? Consider divorce mediation
    • How to make an effective child custody agreement
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What to do when co-parents cannot agree

On Behalf of Law Offices of John A. Guthrie | Oct 25, 2019 | Blog, Child Custody, Child Custody And Support

Parenting is a rewarding but challenging process. You have to hold so much responsibility on your shoulders to provide the best experience you can for your child. However, it becomes even more difficult when you have a co-parent that challenges your every decision.

What do you do when you can’t get along with your co-parent? Luckily, there are techniques that help co-parents manage their partnerships while also parenting their children in the best way they can.

Analyze the conflict before battling it out

Whether you disagree on schedules, money or activities, you need to take a step back before reacting and ask yourself a few questions:

  • What does my ex get out of this?
  • What role am I playing in the situation?
  • Is this worth fighting over?
  • What is best for my child?

If you feel that you still need to fight the issue, talk it out in a respectful manner because an aggressive response creates only more problems for you and your family.

Consider “parallel parenting”

Parallel parenting is a relatively new strategy where the parent who has the children, at any given time, oversees decision making and care. Most co-parents don’t like this method because it doesn’t cover significant decisions, such as healthcare and finances for the child. However, it’s great for parents who don’t communicate effectively or struggle to stay away from conflict.

The most substantial downside is that parents who agree to parallel parenting aren’t supposed to intervene in the co-parent’s decisions. It helps minimize conflict but also puts your child at risk for poor decision-making. It’s up to you to determine if this approach works for your family.

Consider professional help

If your disagreements are continually affecting your child, seek professional advice from the court. The judge and attorneys will be able to help you settle your disputes and find an arrangement that works for both parents.

Some cases where professional advice is necessary are disagreement surrounding custody and child support. Do not try to iron out those details without the proper legal advocate by your side.

Unfortunately, you can’t force someone, especially a co-parent, to agree with you, but you can use these strategies to find compromises and be the best parents you can be to your kids. It will make everyone happier in the future.

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