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What really happens during a divorce - and how to make sure you are ready for it

Divorce is something that most people do not clearly understand. They think that by filing to end their marriage that they will experience a clean break once things are finalized. However, once a person decides to file for divorce, they will experience major changes that will have a significant impact upon their future.

If you take time to learn about some of the things that happen during a divorce, you can have a better idea of what to do when you experience challenges. By eliminating some of these roadblocks, you can make the entire divorce much less stressful, which will allow you to make the best decisions for your situation. This posting discusses some of the most important things that happen during a divorce, and some of the steps that you can take to be ready for the future. 

Not everyone is looking out for you

You may lose friends once you decide to end your marriage. Some of these friends may be people that you have known your entire life. You have to be extremely careful about what you say and who you say it to at this time. This includes the use of social media, as your Facebook friends might tell your ex everything that you post about your divorce. Do not let your frustrations get the best of you.

If you have kids with your ex, you will have to learn how to work together

This is perhaps the most difficult thing that couples will have to deal with during and after the divorce. Even if your spouse is making things impossible for you, you need to keep the best interests of your children in mind at all times. It will take time to find a way to communicate with your ex about the kids, but know that you will need to focus on working together. Make sure that your conversations about the kids are limited to basic needs and concerns. Do not let yourself get trapped into arguments about what led the marriage to dissolve.

Gathering financial information might be impossible

Do you have any idea how much money is in your spouse's retirement accounts? What will you do with your home when you are divorced? Do you have equity in the property? How much debt have you accumulated during the marriage and how will it be divided?

Like most people going through a divorce, you may not even be able to guess the answer to these questions. If you do not obtain this information before filing, it becomes much more difficult to obtain these documents from your ex. You do not want to find out that your spouse was concealing assets during the divorce.

Speak to an experienced attorney once you feel that divorce might be in your future. Your attorney can provide you with an overview of the divorce process, and also help you understand some of the things that you must do to be ready for what is about to happen in your situation.

If you simply decide to file without taking these steps, the entire divorce can become much more complicated and contentious. You and your spouse will be pursuing your own separate interests, and finding common ground will be difficult. By having the information you need to support your positions, you will stand a much better chance of obtaining results that are in your favor. 

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